What I wish people would’ve done

Following Matthew’s birth and death, we were flooded with thoughtful gifts and gestures, for which I am forever grateful. Everything from flowers to trees, care boxes, jewelry, candles, cards, and meals, among many other sweet items – I was floored by the creative ways people memorialized him.

Each gift brought joy…and tears…, and I was continually moved by how his short life touched my people.

Naturally, in time, the sentiments dwindled as people returned to their routines while our world remained at a standstill. With that came the pressures to “move on,” “get over it,” and “let it go” – which any loss family will tell you doesn’t actually happen. We learn to take our next steps forward, allow grief and joy to co-exist, and eventually find our way to living well as we live our child’s legacy, but we never actually get over their death.

That’s where the “what I wish people had done for me” void exists. It’s in the platitudes, the rush to move on in life after loss, and minimizing the lasting impact his death leaves on our family – the future moments missed, the incomplete family photos, missing our firstborn, our only son, our big brother. There’s just not a moment he’s not longed for, and I live with that reality daily while everyone else gets to return to everyday life.

Baby Matthew Morrow by NILMDTS Affiliated Photographer …