My Why- Missy Thomas, NILMDTS Affiliated Photographer

We call them ‘framily’…those friends that have become as much our family as the ones we were born into. We spend Thanksgivings and Christmases together, vacation together, watch each other’s kids grow up, and share in all the joys and sorrows.

It was April of 2014 and I was so looking forward to sharing one of those joys as my dear friends Peyton and Justin were preparing to welcome their third baby. After two beautiful little girls, I had my fingers crossed that they would get their little boy this time.

I was several states away, but Peyton’s mom kept me updated as labor progressed. I went to bed on the 5th just knowing that we’d have a baby by sunrise. While that did hold true, nothing went as we had hoped. There were complications, a crash c-section, and one perfect baby boy.

That moment – the one where we went from anticipating a brand-new baby to the one where we knew he wasn’t going to make it through the day – was so sudden and so tragic that I could almost feel the earth shake.

James died in Peyton’s arms a mere 18 hours after he was born.

With my husband heading out the door for a deployment, I couldn’t get there for two more days. I never got to meet James in person. Peyton had hired a birth photographer, so although they didn’t …