Quinn Bartrug by Nano Visser

Cody Bartrug and I gave a presentation at UCSF together. When he shared images of his baby, Quinn, it made my heart break all over again, and yet Cody shows me the power of the human spirit --- he changed his direction in life and now cares for so many other families who are going through what he went through.  His presence in the NICU is a blessing for all the families there.  He has changed the culture in the NICU, and made it more understanding, kinder . . .

 To read more about Cody's story and the impact Nano had on his family:  https://www.nowilaymedowntosleep.org/blog/lessons-from-quinn/

I saw a presentation by Sandy Puc' right when she was starting NILMDTS.  Having suffered an early loss more than 33 years ago, I knew the feeling of losing a baby.  On top of being a newborn photographer with a lot of medical professionals in my family, it seemed like natural fit. My surgeon father would take us on weekend rounds when we were children; we waited in the waiting room or an office or at a nurses' station a lot, so hospitals feel familiar and comfortable to me, which made it easier in the beginning. I knew I had the photographer skills, and the comfort of navigating a hospital room. In 2010, I submitted my photographer application and have been serving families in my community with this need since. 

As humans, we need to do whatever we can to make the world better for the people around us. I knew if I can use my photography skills to help a grieving family preserve memories of a precious baby and move through the worst day of their lives, then I am honored to do so.

It has been an amazing gift, that people trust me to photograph their baby in this situation.  I then become one of the few people in the world lucky enough to meet their child, and I feel like I hold that gift of being trusted, and that love that I witness, forever. I have witnessed such strength, such resilience, and such love . I truly believe it is a gift to ME each time a family shares themselves and their grief with me, and I hold them and their child(ren) in my heart. 

When a grieving parent gently comforts a grieving partner, or a grieving grandparent gently brushes their daughter's hair and comforts her, or parents tenderly show an older sibling their sleeping baby sibling, all those moments are so powerful to witness.

They are humbling, so I truly am grateful to be allowed to share them.

I am honored by each baby I meet, and they all continue to hold a special place in my heart.

If you have been wavering on if you are the right person to volunteer in this way, I encourage you to ask yourself, what's holding you back? If you have the skills and the heart, you can do this.

Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, a dedicated 501(c)(3) non-profit, offers families experiencing pregnancy and infant loss with complimentary remembrance portraits, capturing precious moments with their babies. Your generous donation can help us extend this heartfelt service to more families in need. Please consider supporting us here.